I don't generally like to discuss how hungry I am or how much I love food or anything in the realm of aforementioned topics because I feel that it only adds to the notion that I am a fat kid. Because it does and I am. Now before you get all politically correct on me or ply me with compliments because you are worried about my self-esteem let me explain what I define being a "fat kid" as.
FAT KID: Someone who has an obsession with food/snacks/sweets/junk food/health food/fruit/vegetables/even those nasty chocolate covered insects that some people eat, regardless of weight, age, or height.
Okay? So stop punching me when I call your child/wife/mother a "fat kid." I don't mean literally fat. I just mean she likes food more than oxygen! Can I get a witness?
Anyway, today my fat kid-edness is two fold. You see, sometimes my inner fat kid only wants one specific thing. This morning it was peanut butter cookies. So I enjoyed hot chocolate and peanut butter cookies as I went about my correspondence (that's what I call the time I waste on facebook). Unfortunately my inner fat kid was so contented with my pseudo-breakfast that it went to sleep and didn't have the brains to wake up until I was already at work! That's where part two of my fat kid tendencies came alive. Do you know what is embarrassing on your third day at a new job? When you are one of two writers in an office and your stomach is trying to audition for American Idol. I couldn't even hope that Ben thought it was someone else!
Now I am having a fat kid meltdown. I am so hungry that I can't decide what to eat and it makes me angry which makes me more hungry and I don't want to cook and I don't want to spend money... it's an endless fat kid cycle.
An endless fat kid cycle.
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AMEN TO THAT!!
ReplyDeleteMy name is Shanna and I am a "fat kid."